For queer people in China, pets provide a sense of home

The Chinese love their pets. A 2022 report showed that the number of pet dogs and cats neared 200 million, with household penetration rising from 12% in 2012 to 25% in 2021. While the rate remains lower than in Western nations, Chinese households spend relatively more per pet. In 2021, annual Chinese pet expenditures averaged 2,041 yuan ($286) per pet, accounting for 6.73% of household spending, versus only 1.71% in the U.S.

For many pet owners in China, their lovable companions are often referred to as “best friends” and are seen as a significant part of their lives. But for those within the LGBTQ community, pets mean even more as they open up new ways to think about family ties and parenthood.

“Many of my queer friends have pets,” a 30-year-old lesbian who prefers to be called J told The China Project. “I hear them talking about keeping one when their life is more stable.”

J lived 10 years in Beijing, where she and her girlfriend, Liz, owned four cats together. The cats are now living with Liz after J relocated to Canada in 2021.

J got her first cat in 2017. Back then, she was still single. Loneliness led her to take in a kitten that her friend’s cat had recently birthed. One year later, she met Liz, who also had a cat.

When they decided to move in together and started looking for an apartment to rent, J and Liz narrowed their search to only those on the first or second floor so that their cats could have access to outdoor space. Soon after they settled in the new home, other cats in their complex soon came calling. The couple built a temporary shelter on their balcony for a pregnant cat and let her give birth inside. Friends adopted the kittens, but the mother didn’t leave, so J and Liz took her in. They eventually housed another stray kitten separated from its mother.

In China, many young people living in urban areas call themselves “cat slave” or “dog slave” to describe their devotion to their pets. Liú Tíngtíng 刘亭亭, an associate professor at the School of Journalism and Communication at Jinan University in Guangzhou and an adjunct fellow within the Faculty of Design, Architecture & Building at the University of Technology Sydney, explained to The China Project that the trend of pet keeping is caused by multiple factors, including the vast market of pet economy, people’s changing understanding of animals, and the rising challenges of forming intimate human relationships, whether romantic love or child-rearing.

In a 2021 academic article, Liu and several other researchers examined the relationship between single professional women in urban China and their companion animals, concluding that as more and more Chinese women postpone or forgo marriage and family to focus on their work and newfound freedoms, pets help them find a sense of home.

It’s not unusual for pet owners to consider their domesticated animals as members of the family, but J noted that for queer people, there’s something special about forming familial relationships with their pets.

In China, same-sex marriage has not yet been legally recognized. Because adoption is extremely difficult and reproductive technologies are limited to married heterosexual couples, Chinese queer couples who want children often have no choice but to use online surrogacy services, which exist in a legal gray zone riddled with scams.

For J, who doesn’t see herself having children soon, her girlfriend’s presence and their four cats are “what make our home truly feel complete,” she said. “The cat my girlfriend brought into our family when we met provided her invaluable companionship during some of her most challenging times. She wouldn’t have survived those times without her cat.”

Similarly, Xiǎobái 小白, a 27-year-old lesbian, also feels a unique affinity with her cats from a familial point of view. In 2019, Xiaobai adopted her first cat, a four-month-old kitten who loved jumping around her small bedroom and keeping her awake for the entire night. Working for a nonprofit organization in Guangzhou, she could only afford one single room due to her limited income. The balcony in her apartment was the only area where the kitten could have some extra space, but Xiaobai worried about its safety and kept it inside.

“I felt quite depressed during that period, to the extent that I occasionally had auditory hallucinations of her kitten’s wheezes at the workplace,” she told The China Project, comparing her cat parenting with exhausting child-rearing.

However, having a cat is not all doom and gloom, Xiaobai added. She confessed that when confronted with major obstacles or challenges in work or life, she often finds herself envisioning a future where she is a mother and raising a child as a potential alternative path to find purpose in life.

“When I wanted an escape from reality’s pressures, I found myself thinking about having a child, I mean, the idea of creating something new,” she said. “Much like raising a child, caring for my cats and watching them grow up provided a similar feeling of fulfillment.”

Other LGBTQ stories:

Hong Kong court rejects government appeals over public housing rights for same-sex couples (Hong Kong Free Press)

In a recent legal victory for the LGBTQ community, a Hong Kong court ruled that refusing to give same-sex couples the same housing rights as their heterosexual counterparts was unlawful and unconstitutional.

For queer couples wanting a child in China, surrogacy brings hope and danger (Rest of World)

To bear children, gay people in China are turning to commercial surrogacy services online, which exist in a murky legal landscape. Censorship of queer content online further limits access to reliable information and leaves prospective parents at risk of being misled or scammed.